I had been leading the Women's Meditation/Recovery meeting for over 2 years when the participation level started dropping off. I was determined for this meeting to continue on...but fate wasn't having it. I tried many different ways to pump life back into the group, but it finally died a slow death.
What I discovered by letting the group go was that I had not been very active in the AA community and had gotten away from the foundation of my own recovery.
By letting go of this meeting it got me back into 12-step groups and it also led me to exploring new meetings.
I was excited to find a Sunday morning group near my home. This meeting was hard to find and I ended up arriving late. I eagerly walked in to find a room full of black leathered, bearded bikers and discovered I was in the Bikers in Recovery meeting where you don't have to be a biker to attend (whew!) This meeting was an amazing experience for me. Even though I am about as opposite of a burley biker as you can get, I felt so accepted, welcomed and truly seen for who I am.
I experienced a new level appreciation for the program of AA and how absolutely surreal it is that I can walk into a room full of strangers and because we have not just the common bond of alcoholism, but more importantly the common bond of a spiritual path of recovery I can immmediately be accepted for who I am regardless of my age, color, gender, sexual preference, or even religious beliefs because none of those things matter in the program of AA. We are all connected on a much deeper level because of our mutual dis-ease.
I've spent much of my life interested in community, connection, tolerance, and acceptance. And to think it was from being an alcoholic that I actually found it in a room where they pass a motorcycle helmet to take up the collection, and start the Serenity Prayer by asking, "who's ya daddy?"