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It was a big effin deal!

During a therapy session to work through an unconscious block to reaching the next level of success in my professional life, I was asked if I had ever been in the hospital. "Well that was a strange question," I thought, but we were afterall, going after this block through unconventional means. "Yes, one time. I had spinal meningitis." "What were your thoughts around it at that time?" the healer asked. I reflected upon that time in my life and how ill I was, but how reluctant I was to convey to those around me just how sick I was. No, actually it wasn't reluctance, I didn't comprehend how sick I was because I had spent my entire life minimizing things like illness, emotional discomfort, fa

9 Days Sober

At 9 days sober, I thought I knew it all. Now, I'm a few weeks away from celebrating 10 years of recovery and I'm reading through the journals of my first months of the journey. The interesting and surprising thing is that I DID know a lot. I am reading the wisdom that I had even though I had barely gotten the alcohol out of my blood stream. This goes against everything I was taught in early recovery. I was taught that my best thinking had gotten me to the mess I was in. I wish I'd had a loving guide that assured me I had a ton of wisdom in me and that I could trust it, and it was critical to not numb the wisdom out with alcohol or by switching to other addictions. Alcohol numbed it and dumb

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